Rodney Dangerfield/The J. Geils Band

The host for the episode is Rodney Dangerfield, and the musical guest is The J. Geils Band. The skits for this episode are as follows: Rodney Dangerfield tries to get ready for the show but finds that Father Guido Sarducci is using his dressing room to sleep in. During his opening monologue, Rodney discusses the lack of respect he gets in his sex life and his childhood. At a sperm bank, all the customers want their children fathered by Rodney, but the donor is having a hard time keeping up with demand. During the Weekend Update, Jane Curtain reports on President Carter's foreign policy gaffes and the FDA's ruling on artificial sweeteners, Bill Murray reports on a suppressed 60 Minutes report and Muhammad Ali's latest bout, then scolds Jerry Mathers for spreading rumors that he died in Vietnam. A substitute judge takes over a courtroom for a day, but finds that everyone is more interested in tricking him into letting them goof off. The J. Geils Band performs "Love Stinks" and "Sanctuary".